My life is a lie

Back at it again after some time off

This time.. everything around me is tumbling down.
I'm close to feeling lost again.
First of March I gotten my first job!
I loved my job a lot as well as my director.
I was so grateful that I was given the opportunity to work at DTT.
Until more staffs came in and when politic kicks in.
It was a tough decision to resign but it was for the best.
So much issue came along after that.
I'm glad I'm out now.
Somehow it was a blessing in disguise.

Then here comes the bomb.
Y can't come back to Malaysia anymore.
We made plans and all for our upcoming monthsary.
Things hasn't been easy for us.
It was a roller coaster ride throughout the months.
But we didn't give up and made it to where we are today.
Sadly, life wants to throw us more hurdle.
I really hate this feeling of losing something that's so close to you.
I have lost a lot already.
Life, spare me please....

Although Y neglects me sometimes and don't portrays his affections much.
But I know deep down inside he loves me a lot. So so much..
Which was why I choosed to be patience and stayed till now.
He's the only guy whom I really trust a lot.
He has became my everything..
I can never find another Y in my life..

Why must I always be separated from something that I love a lot.
It's always my closest.. dearest..
WHY.
Idk how everything's gonna turn out now.
I feel very insecure without a plan.
I can't do all this alone.

I have always believe in doing good to others.
But why do I still get punished all the time.
What have I done so wrong in life to take everything away from me.
Please stop taking from me....



imissyou